February 2014

Advertising and Kids
I know how to stimulate the economy. Not create job growth, necessarily. This plan would almost certainly not address the…
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The Jesuit Standoff
Pooping embarrasses me more than almost anything. You might say I suffer from a super-minor form of parcopresis. It’s not…
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An Open Letter to Shitty Husbands, Vol. 6
You think you’re being nice. But you’re not. You think you’re doing her a favor. But you’re not. You think…
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Hangovers and $4 Lobster
Because I had more fun than I usually do last night, I don’t feel amazing today. While I was being…
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I Don’t Smoke Cigars
It’s the little moments that change your life forever. The whispers. The That almost happened! moments. The close calls. ……
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The Greatest Generation
After my parents came back to the house to tell me which one of them I was going to live…
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“Dad! I Have to Show You Something.”
Uh-oh. That can mean so many things. “Daaaad! I have to show you something,” my five-year-old yelled from down the…
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The Problems That Remain
When I have a bunch of chores, I tend to save the hardest stuff for last. I think there’s probably…
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The Art of Dating Discrimination
I’ve only had three girlfriends ever make it past the get-to-know-you phase. It’s because both my mom and dad had…
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A Girl at a Bar
It was to be a different kind of Valentine’s Day. I was okay with that. My five-year-old son had a…
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Matt Fray

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