This is How Your Marriage Ends book cover

Discover How to Have Healthy and Successful Relationships

From author, blogger and relationship coach Matthew Fray—a.k.a. the guy who found out too late

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About the Book

Most relationships end with a whimper, not a bang.

Just as health professionals from yesteryear were compelled to sound the alarm regarding the dangers of smoking tobacco to a then-unaware public, This is How Your Marriage Ends is here to help raise awareness regarding the seemingly benign behaviors we do with little to no thought that kill love and trust in relationships.

A resource for couples who are dating before marriage, who are currently married, or for people who divorced and want to know why, This is How Your Marriage Ends will help people identify relationship-killing behavior patterns and communication habits in their own lives, and point them toward resources that can help them break free from the cycles of dysfunction that commonly crop up and ruin relationships.

Meet Matt

Matthew Fray is a relationship coach, blogger, and author of This is How Your Marriage Ends: A Hopeful Approach to Saving Relationships.

My marriage ended in 2013. It involved a lot of sobbing, self-loathing, and feeling sorry for myself. A drunken phone call with a phone-a-therapist prompted me to “journal my feelings,” only instead of writing in a private journal like an adult, I drank more alcohol and published it to the internet.

I found new life and purpose blogging about the end of my marriage, discussing relationships with others, and self-reflecting on how my own beliefs and actions contributed to my family’s demise. A bunch of people said it looked, sounded, and felt just like their marriage, and we all had a holy shit moment together, realizing collectively that our relationship conflict and trust-erosion patterns are all pretty much the same.

That journey blossomed into a new career as a relationship coach, and then, an opportunity to write a book.

I’m the divorced guy who got a tiny bit famous for leaving dishes by the sink. But it turns out it was never really about the dishes.

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I’ve long admired your frankness; I simply do NOT have your courage. I admire the ‘guts’ it takes to write what you write; and how you write it too.

Robert B.


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I love the way you write—no matter the topic. I love your ability to put words together in a beautiful way—your honesty and sensitivity come through.


Get 1-on-1 Coaching From Matt

Discover new ways to think about your own beliefs and behaviors, and practice new habits designed to maintain or restore trust in your most important relationships. Explore how working with Matthew as your relationship coach can lead to positive changes in life and love.

You helped save my marriage. My husband and I are communicating better than we ever have and for the first time we truly have a partnership.



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Matt Fray

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